THIS ELATION
This elation,
this sunlight after the snow,
and this page my lover,
because we are alone.
Look how the cypress trees
edge my thoughts and the
sweet smelling mimosa
peeks her delicate head
into my window to see me
under a canopy of dreams
of warmth and want - and
flowers that grow from
one world into the next,
their fragrance my desire.
Now, your kiss - a languid
fall into love all over again.
This elation,
this sunlight after the snow,
and this page my lover,
because we are alone.
Look how the cypress trees
edge my thoughts and the
sweet smelling mimosa
peeks her delicate head
into my window to see me
under a canopy of dreams
of warmth and want - and
flowers that grow from
one world into the next,
their fragrance my desire.
Now, your kiss - a languid
fall into love all over again.
18 comments:
Aw! Very cute, against the backdrop of a beautiful image... hope you're not too buried in that snow. :P
this is stunning - i always think of "elation" as a kind of giddy feeling, but here it's so smooth and intentional - i get the sense that this is a time-tested love, but is still alive and moving and discovering - it reads perfectly like that "languid fall" - and it is entirely the present. it is a love to aspire to.
the language of it is great too - "a canopy of dreams / of warmth and want" is magnificent. seems like a blizzard or two isn't so bad if you're snowed in with the right person!
I am with Joaquin on this - it is absolutely stunning. The movement from image to image, lingering over each in turn, gives the impression of timelessness to a most satisfying love that is still filled with desire.
The language of this is just beautiful.
Halfway through my other comment I read this in a very different way, mostly hinging on the lack of a comma. So, while this may be way off, here is another thought.
Is it possible that this is not about a physical lover at all, but rather about art? The speaker (poet/writer/reader) is alone with her writing or a poem she is reading, "...this page my lover." Perhaps the page itself has a description of the trees that "edge [her] thoughts" or she creates these herself, dreams of another existence - the world of art, where "flowers...grow from/one world into the next." The kiss at the end of the poem is the seal upon the act - falling into love with her art all over again.
Even if I'm wrong, I like this possibility.
I hear you, and Whitman in this...
wish I'd written these images...
thank you
Kaye, I'm elated, because this poem is so beautiful! The voice, the rhythm, that lovely form and flow. It makes me want to turn cartwheels! Joaquin is so right to use the word "smooth." It flows like a love that is steady. It is eternal.
It instantly makes me think of my hubby. In that sense, it is such a beautiful love poem. I love that it is not like Hallmark or a stereotypical love poem. The images are unique and I LOVE the cypress tress "edge my thoughts" and the sweet smelling mimosa. Fantastic!
I also like Karen's take. I didn't read it that way at first, but I love her idea. The canopy of dreams could indeed be art. It's so cool how that is open for interpretation. Excellent poem!
This should be put to music.
Dreams and reality wafting together, with all their sweet sharpness. Like two warm winds rubbing shoulders.
I can't tell you how much I love this, Kaye. It has me all glassy-eyed and smiling. You've intoxicated us all, methinks. :) I tripped down these radiant lines, and felt myself getting warmer and warmer.
Now, your kiss - a languid
fall into love all over again
I love endings that are beginnings, too. So intensely beautiful.
(And is it just me, or has this been a good week for poetry? I've read some stunners lately!)
Kaye, I'm usually sketchy about love poems, because so much has been written already... but this is outstanding... I love the spacing and the imagery... this poem keeps the genre alive... beautiful work, my friend.
Joseph, thank you very much for your comment. We don't have that much here - not like some years. We are supposed to get more here tonight.
Joaquin, as always, you interpret my poetry so well. Thank you for the observations and the complimentary remarks. Yes, a blizzard can be delightful in that way. ;)
Karen - you amaze me. I moved the comma after page and put it after lover. I guess, I was of the two minds, as well. Either interpretation is correct in meaning and reach. I moved the comma after the "kiss". *?*
Terry, thanks for that!
Julie, I appreciate your enthusiasm for this. I guess Valentine's Weekend just begs for a love poem. Karen did pick up on what I had first intended....As you say, either interpretation is viable. Thanks, Jules.
Gerry - what a nice comment. Thank you!
Sarah, I appreciate your wonderful comments. They mean so much to me. Yes, the poetry has been so great these past few weeks! :)
Bob, I am flattered, indeed. Thank you so much for the lovely remarks.
You sincerely know the language of love and longing, Kay.
It was like building a house of cards as I read through the lines. And this one doesn't break either. :)
Amen to Rick on your knowledge the language of love and longing...
Thank you for enriching our lives
Rick - I just typed your name like this "risk" - Is there anything you want to tell me, bro?
Now - thank you for so spendid a comment.
Aniket, thanks so much! :)
Oh, Terry - what a very great thing to say!!!!!!!!! :)))))
I'm safe, Kay. Really...
LOL - Rick!! I don't know you are related to pirates (didn't you say that)??
I feel that flood of emotion sweeping me with all my senses from your poem.
Gel - many thanks for your lovely comment. xo
Post a Comment